Developing Discernment: Part 2
Paying Attention
I remember a YouTube video I saw several years back. As the video opens, there are several pairs of people on a basketball court lined up to pass a basketball between them. Instructions come up on the screen asking the viewer to count how many times the basketballs are passed. The pairs of players start passing their basketballs and 30 to 45 seconds later they stop as the question is raised, “How many times was the basketball passed?” Each viewer gives the number they counted when a second, very unexpected question appears on the screen: “Did you see the gorilla in the background?” What? The gorilla? What are they talking about? They video is then showed for second time, and, to my surprise, there is a person, dressed as a gorilla dancing across the screen in the background.
The first time I watched the video experiment I did not believe it. I thought for sure the gorilla dressed man was not in the first showing of the video. It was sure it was a plant in the second showing. So, I rewatched the whole thing from the start and Oh My Gosh! the gorilla outfit danced across the screen. I was so focused on counting how many times the basketball was passed that I was completely oblivious to a man dressed as gorilla dancing across the whole background of the video!
While other viewers more observant than I saw the gorilla the first time, the experiment still illustrates a powerful point – it is much easier to find what we are looking for. Stated another way, attention is a potent gift because it so often determines our focus and pursuit. It matters what we pay attention too.
This importance of attention isn't just shown in modern experiments but has been known for ages. Jesus captured this perfectly when He said, "Seek first the Kingdom of God." (Matthew 6:33) The important word to hear this is passage is first. Jesus states many other things in the passage that are important to life such as work, food and clothing. Those things are worthy of attention and are often the very places where the Kingdom of God shows up in the middle of. Our attention shapes what we do, the choices we make, and what we go after. If we are to be aware of the presence of God’s Kingdom in our midst, it must of our first attention. It matters what we pay attention too.
Focused attention not only guides our external activities but also profoundly influences the development of our hearts, affections, and desires. In other words, it plays a vital role in shaping our spiritual life in relation to Jesus. Although my attention alone does not bring about transformation, directing my attention towards the workings of Jesus enables me to become a more active and willing participant in the process.
In our busy world with many voices calling for our attention, it can be difficult to notice God voice and invitations to us. Ignatius recognized this challenge and its impact on our spiritual life. He provided a practical tool called The Prayer of Examen to help us focus on Jesus. This practice involves pausing, reflecting on our day, and becoming aware of God's actions. It cultivates attention to deepen our relationship with Jesus and align our desires with His will. By regularly practicing the Examen, we can grow more attentive to God’s presence and responsive to His invitations. God does not have to be the gorilla we miss in the background. Rather, through the practice of the Examen, He can by grace become what our attention is on throughout the course of our day and live.
Let’s take some time to talk about how to make the Prayer of Examen part of your daily routine. We'll break it down using the acronym P.R.A.Y. The parts of the Prayer of Examen are Practice being aware of Jesus, Relish His gifts and blessings, Attend to what God puts on our mind, and Yield to His grace in how we respond to Him.
1. Practice the Presence of Jesus. (3-5 min)
a. Start your practice by finding a position that is comfortable yet helps you be attentive. I find sitting up in a comfortable chair with my feet on the ground to be a position that is relaxing but not so restful that II become distracted or drowsy.
b. As you enter prayer, become attentive to the presence of Jesus that is with you, and has been with you throughout your day. This could be done through prayerful silence, or with a one- or two-word prayer that is expressive of who God is (Love, Faithful, My Shepherd, etc.). Another way is to prayerfully ask yourself, “Who has God been for me today?” and then listen for what Jesus may say. Maybe a word or a picture comes to mind that describes how you experienced God’s presence with you throughout the day.
c. This has to be the starting place because it sets the tone for the rest of what you are about to do. First, how I see God looking at me will impact my openness to Him. If my picture of God’s gaze is one of impatience or disappointment, I will be reluctant to be open to His words and invitations to me. Yet, as I remember that His gaze to me is one of love, my heart becomes open to His drawings and invitations. Second, if I do not begin with the awareness of God’s loving presence with me, the examen can quickly become a practice of self-critic in which I can become proud in how well I was attentive to Jesus or become self-deprecating in my perceived failings. Neither of these are the goal or particularly helpful. The prayer and practice are one of inviting God, even as the psalmist did, to search, know, and lead in the way everlasting.
d. In the awareness of God’s present presence, ask the Holy Spirit to lead and direct in your time of prayer.
2. Relish the Gifts of God (3-5 min)
a. In the awareness of God’s loving gaze, take some time to reflect of the day and notice those gifts of grace for which you are thankful. A pleasant conversation? A time with a friend? An unexpected encouragement or compliment? A moment to enjoy the gift of God’s creation? A special sense of God’s presence? An answered prayer?
b. Take the time to express your thankfulness to God for His love, faithfulness, and goodness.
3. Attend to What You Notice (10 min)
a. In the awareness of God’s loving gaze, begin to review the day asking God to help you notice those moments He would have you to attentive to. What were the events of the day? Who were you with? What was your experience of the events and those you shared them with?
b. As you become aware of the day, the experiences and the people prayerfully consider a set of questions. The questions will be a pair of opposites. For instance, two widely used set of questions are 1. What was most life giving to me today? What was most life draining for me today? 2. What am I most thankful for today? What am I least thankful for today? However, the questions can be formed around any specific way you would desire to be attentive to Jesus. For instance, maybe God’s love is something you desire to grow your awareness of and responsiveness too. Therefore, the questions could be: How was I aware of God’s love for me today? How was I forgetful of God’s love today? Or When did I live out of God’s love for me today? When did it not live out of God’s love for me today?
c. As best you can, notice what you notice without judgement. The goal of this is not to grade your “successes” or “failures” of the day. The desire is to grow your awareness of and responsiveness to God’s presence. Thank God for the moments of awareness you notice and ask for the grace to be more aware in the moments of forgetfulness.
4. Yield to God’s Grace (5 min)
a. As your time of prayer draws to an end, give space for confession and the receiving of forgiveness for any moment in your day which the Holy Spirit brings to your attention. Maybe you notice an opportunity that was missed or an interaction that did not flow from love. Confess those moments and receive the grace of God’s forgiveness.
b. Finally, look towards tomorrow. Are there moments of the day you are looking forward too? Are there moments of the day you are concerned or anxious about? Ask for the grace to be attentive and responsiveness to God the day to come.
What did you Notice?
As you take time to step into practicing the Prayer of Examen, I would be very interested to hear of your experience. Was there a something in the practice that was life giving for you? What was it? What was life giving about that part? What is the fruit of the practice that you are noticing in your life? Engage the conversation in the comments below. Looking forward to hearing from you!